Love is the Killer App by Tim Sanders

As with every book I read I'll give you my thoughts up front. Love is the Killer App is a good though wrapped up in a poor delivery. I'd recommend that anyone who is going into a relatively modern business environment give it a read, but be ready for some very silly jargon.

Introduction:

This book was assigned to me for an online class (in a sea of 3 other major reading assignments) and I actually wasn't able to get the book in time for the report that was due, so I had to listen to an audio book version taking notes along the way for the book report. As a result I had to hear Tim Sanders go through each of his points in his own groovy hipster voice.

I will admit that reviewing this book will be a test of my ability to acknowledge the value of the work without allowing my personal tastes to interfere. Obviously this can't be done perfectly, and people reading my reviews must be at least a little bit interested in my opinion as one voice among many. Because of that I'm going to continue to summarize the book in an objective fashion, reserving personal criticisms and commentaries for the criticisms section.

Finally, I honestly try not to judge an assigned reading too harshly. At the very least I look for what the professor saw in the book and what they may have wanted me to glean from the book.

Summary:

Using events from his own life and the lives of people within his personal network Tim Sanders discusses why love (properly defined here as a form of general human compassion and genuine respect) is of great importance in the developing business world.

He deems those who choose love as a priority, "lovecats," a term he chooses in part because it contrasts with the idea of being a, "Mad Dog," in the business world. As described by Sanders, being a lovecat means that you, "Offer your wisdom freely. Give away your address book to everyone who wants it. And always be human." This philosophy of behavior is what Sanders calls "biz-love." He sums these three points up in terms that make up the three major chapters of his book:

1. Knowledge
2. Network
3. Compassion

And these three things are the key to being successful in the new world of business where being a shark or a barracuda is not all there is to being a successful business person.

In his discussion of knowledge, Sander's primary focus is on the gathering of knowledge for one major reason. It makes you useful. This sounds utilitarian and seems to deny the love-based focus of his argument, but his real goal in being useful is to help others. When you do that it helps guarantee your job while helping others. Being knowledgeable makes you useful to everyone around you. Something you have read and have real knowledge of can make you useful in problem solving and brain-storming. You are legitimately useful to people, genuinely helpful.

His primary focus is on the reading of books. 90% is the amount of your reading that should be book related. He gives advice on the entire process. From picking an applicable book (focusing obviously on business related works) to buying multiples of your favorites to pass on to others (further demonstrating the helping others nature of this wisdom). He gives note taking advice and plenty of useful tips on how to retain the information that you are taking into your mind.

Next comes his discussion of networking. As has already been noted in his "lovecat" mission statement, Sanders believes in having an open address book. This is antithetical to the self-involved climber mentality. Most people, he notes, are concerned with amassing connections to make them indispensable. If you know a guy who can get us a discount at that other firm because you two were in the same fraternity, that gives superiors a reason to keep you around.

Sanders offers a different idea of networking. It isn't a personal hoarding of names, numbers, emails and contacts. Instead he recommends a personal connecting of people who can help each other. Do you have a friend with a problem? Do you know people who could assist him? Then introduce them. He compares this to setting up a blind-date. You can't guarantee either side success all you can do is introduce them, try to help them gel then step out of the way. He offers several guidelines for choosing who to pair with whom. Sanders argues that by doing this you enrich your life and your network with even stronger, more capable groups of people.

The last chapter, compassion focuses on the one thing, genuinely caring about others. Now anyone who has ever seen Wallstreet or any film discussing cut-throat business tactics will have in their mind a perception of fat cat white guys in suits smoking cigars while the poor number crunchers, production workers and sales people suffer under their demands. Sanders proposes another way; one that doesn't foster a back-stabbing, dirty-dealing, corner-cutting way of behaving. A way guided by love.

The true essence of this philosophy is not to simply be a facilitator of what others need, but to also be what they need. We continue developing as people throughout our lifetime, and we must be willing to express compassion for others both for their development and for ours. You are showing that you see value in people and that creates an experience, which will make you memorable. Some people try other methods, with a limited manufactured experience or simply feeding greed, but nothing is a substitute for a genuine feeling of compassion toward another human being. People are willing to commit to people that show compassion.

When Sanders discusses compassion, he considers it a two part process: sensing and expressing. Sensing is not simply seeing or hearing, but being observant and remembering your observations. This will help you develop a meaningful way to follow the next step, expressing. Starting with the eyes is Sanders’ ultimate advice for a person who is trying to show compassion. There is nothing like eye contact to press upon someone how much you care about them. Sanders also strongly recommends physical contact, but with many caveats and warnings about being considerate to personal space. As far as when to do these things he recommends three insertion points: salutations, conversations and "quick opps" (opportunities that may appear intermittently).

It is with these thoughts that Sanders closes the book.

Criticisms:

Negatives:

1. Jargon:
   As I noted in my opening, I found this book to be excessively filled with Sanders' personal Jargon. "Biz-world," "Lovecat," "biz-love," and even the title term "killer app," make this feel too much like I need to be Tim Sanders for this method to work for me. This Jargon issue informs my next negative as well.
2. Too cool:
   Tim Sanders is a guy who is very purposefully on the cutting edge. In and of itself this doesn't bother me. The problem is that the way he writes conveys the same, "I know and you don't," mentality that someone who knows about the music scene gives when they say, "you should really hear them live," or "Their earlier stuff was so much better, listen to their early stuff." The jargon is part of that, but another contribution to this is my next negative.
3. Overly Personal:
   Every story is about himself, a co-worker or a buddy. Now the truth is that maybe this guy is so connected that everyone he could possibly write about falls into one of these categories, but there is a more likely explanation. He has done no greater research on the truth or potential of what he is saying. Every argument is heavily anecdotal and so specific to a certain setting that it's hard to see where that story helps the reader.
4. Downplays Difficulties:
   Largely, when Sanders discusses a difficulty in becoming a "lovecat" it seems like they are all internal struggles. Never mind that some business schools still encourage you to be a shark, or that many of the bosses still got to their positions with underhanded tactics. I may be somewhat cynical, but I think there are many businesses where you would be crushed for pursuing "biz-love"

Positives:

1. Appealing:
   Don't misconstrue any of my doubts for disagreements. I love what Sander's has to say. I agree that what we need in the world of business is greater openness and helpfulness. As a person who is normally very open and giving it's good to know that to Tim Sanders (and others like him) are looking for people who are willing to be loving toward others rather than cold and self-interested.
2. Challenging:
   Even as a person who supports Sanders thoughts on the matter I found his beliefs quite challenging. Reading constantly, actively seeking opportunities to help people, these are things that can be difficult when most of what we are thinking about is how to survive our day. The push Sanders has is well characterized as "evangelizing," though not in the traditional fashion. He is delivering "good news" of a sort. The news that love can do us well in business is challenging, it requires us to be willing to step out. "Risk being taken advantage of," that is the call of this book.

Final Thoughts:

In general, I like the book. My biggest concern is that the jargon and general writing style of Tim Sanders will alienate the very people who need to hear this the most. The hard-hearted barracudas won't respect this lesson, in large part, because they won't hold any regard for Sanders form of expression.

It's a good book with a meaningful lesson, but I might have given up on it, if I hadn't had to write a book report about it. And I'm someone who agrees with what Sanders was saying, how much more would people who are in stark disagreement with the points he is making.

So go ahead, and read it. He offers great thoughts on how to go about getting the most out of your readings. How best to interact with people, and how best to connect people.

So there's that, I'll be working to get the other 3 summer reading books posted over the next few weeks.

Ti Voglio Bene,
-matt